Susieboldt's Blog

Random Comments from a Dreamer

Instability a Good Thing?

Everything is changing for me…yet again.

I wrote my first novel, the first draft anyways. I’ve now handed it out to people who will give me their much needed opinion. Today was the first day that I wasn’t staring at my lap top for six hours. I pretty much didn’t know what to do with myself. Also, school starts tomorrow; the very first year that I will be attempting to take five courses instead of four, and hold down, a so far non-existent, part-time job. I’ve also just ended my youth leader duties for the church I attend, because of school, and my baseball season is finished. Although, not only are physical obligations ending and beginning; I also feel as though I have changed on the inside as well. I won’t try to describe these changes, as I don’t know how to even put those changes in words, but what I can tell you, is that everything is up in the air for me.

My life feels up-rooted and unstable. I’m wondering whether this instability is a good or bad thing.

When life is perfectly planned and everything is stagnant, growth is un-achievable. In fact, most comfortable people, as in comfortable in their lives, don’t think about growth when they’re in this position. Comfort and stability seems to make a person forget about growth, whether that be spiritual growth, relational growth, or any kind of growth for that matter. When a person is comfortable in their stability, stability is all that matters to them.

Instability, on the other hand, literally forces a person to grow. It forces a person to make decisions, and most of the time those decisions are the ones that would have never been options, had it not been for instability.

I am now in the position of change and growth. I’m thinking about options that I would have never even considered a few months ago. I could tutor for free with a volunteer organization. I could join an outreach committee that specializes in large youth functions. I could volunteer with a Christian school board. These are all options that I am considering all because my life has been, for the moment, up-rooted.

Instability has even forced me to take a good long look at my spiritual life. Where can I do better? What are my weaknesses, and are they holding me back from something potentially life changing? What can I do for my community? Where can I better be spiritually fed? These are all questions that I’ve had to answer, all because my stagnant life suddenly became changed.

I’ve decided that instability is not just a good thing, instability is a great thing, unwelcome as it is; it is needed for me to grow. And if I am not growing each and every day, then I am useless to humanity. Sitting in my house, watching my TV shows, staring out my front window; it’s all very useless, and the recent instability in my life has become some much needed chaos.

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September 8, 2010 - Posted by | Uncategorized


  1. Hey Sweezy!! I just wanted to say that your post was very inspirational. I’m glad you’ve come to realize instability as being a gift! I hope you are able to keep this motivated and positive mindset and try new things! I’m sure it would go a long way, and be much appreciated.. You’ll always have my support =)

    Comment by Billy | September 15, 2010 | Reply

    • Thanks for your comment, Billy!

      Comment by susieboldt | September 15, 2010 | Reply

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